*Zepplin was kidnapped by the Piper to find out what the heck was up with Chatty
*Dot's cameos then organized a rescue attempt despite knowing that it was probably a trap
*Chatty (still in Flying Toaster Mode, one assumes :) abruptly ended her engagement to Ordinal, declaring instead her love for Dot
*The agents returned Zepplin, leaving everyone bewildered and confused
The Bar. With Zepplin's return, the rescue party was called back, so now the various Warner cameos are milling about. The Hooded Figure, who can now be safely revealed as Adam, is seated at the bar (as opposed to the tables) pouring himself a drink. Tifa, having heard the entire convoluted tale summarized above, is now more confused than ever.
Tifa (nursing a headache): Okay. Explain this from the top, again?
Adam (smirks): Well, in the beginning God--
Zepplin: Uh, I don't think she means that far back.
Adam (bops Zepplin in the head): It's called being sarcastic, genius boy. (to Tifa) All right, fine. But this is the last time. Ordinal likes Chatty and wants to marry her. Except Piper likes Ordinal and therefore hates Chatty. But before Piper could do more horrible stuff to Chatty, someone killed Chatty. Piper suspected something funny was going on so she nabbed Zepplin either to torture information out of him or trick Dot into showing up. I didn't want either to happen so I called up the Cameos to spring Zepplin. Then Chatty outed herself and said she was in love with Dot instead of the Ordinal. At the moment, Piper is assuming this to be true and will therefore do everything she can to kiss up to Dot. So Zepplin has returned unharmed and we're sitting here boosting your business.
Tifa (still not quite getting it): But why would Dot know anything?
Adam (somewhat impatient): As an RL, she has access to the narrative, so of course she'd be in on things that a mere Cameo has no clue about. The only reason Piper ever labled Dot as evil was because Dot not only didn't participate in the massive Anti-Chatty Campaign, but has even defended Chatty on several occasions. (pours himself a new drink) But I have this sinking feeling that Chatty being all lovey-dovey with Dot is going to cause more problems than it solves.
Hellmaster Phibrizzo (wandering over): Well, I think it's hilarious. Of course, I'll eventually protest just on the principle that Chatty's my girl and all that, but right now I'm too busy laughing at that fool Johnson! XD
(Concept Space. An absolutely furious Ordinal storms in, grabs the bars of the Authoress' cage, and shakes them furiously.)
Ordinal 6442: Warner! What have you done with my dear, sweet Chatty?
*bored* Like father, like daughter. Do I have to make that "not owning people" speech again?
Ordinal 6442: Cut the flowery bulls***! Stop this nonsense now, or--
(The Authoress' response is to pull on a rope cord that mysteriously descended in front of her, and the Ordinal falls, screaming down a long, long pit, Excel-style.)
*sighs* Stupid possessiveness issues.
(Her expression turns thoughtful as something occurs to her.)
But I wonder. What is Chatty thinking? *sinks back into her chair* Oh, well. A promise is a promise. The other RLs can deal with this.
The promise being that I'll stay out of the storyline until Mira invites me back, hint hint. ;)